In the past 3 weeks without you I have recovered from my wisdom teeth surgery, I have gotten a terrible cold, the flu, a sinus infection and a terrible reaction to my medication.
I opened up to a few girls about what happened and finally feel like I have friends.
I started a new job in a preschool during the day while working nights at the restaurant.
I got an interview for my dream job, landed it, got hired and start training for my new job in a week and a half.
Had an amazing Thanksgiving with my parents, sisters and my amazing grandparents.
Have slept every night without, Finally stopped having nightmares about you.
At first I worried about you, wanted to talk to you; emailed you, facebook messaged you, tried to message you on a dating site, made a profile on a dating site and someone recognized me and asked me if it was me or if someone stole my picture. Now I realize that I cannot talk to you. That I have to let you get help or not get help and deal with what the law will bring to you. I have to accept that you may hate me and blame me for the rest of your life. That I may never get closure with you.
At first I wanted you back so badly. Now all I want is for you to accept the plea deal. I don't know what is going to happen and I have stopped trying to predict and control it. I have to accept that I may never see or hear from you again.
I don't know if you'll ever see this but I just want you to be happy and healthy and get to do what you love in life; work on cars and move back to California.
I still miss you terribly and love you and you will always be my first love.
I can't imagine myself with anyone else. It's so hard to think of myself as "single" but I guess I am single... All I am doing is focusing on work, my new career, my future career plans and goals.
I hope you can do the same.
I love you Boo
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